My life is full of mysteries.. But these mysteries became clearer in view with every MUSIC I play and every PICTURES that I take.. Live.Love.Laugh. :)
Background Illustrations provided by: http://edison.rutgers.edu/

I just went through a break up. Just lost a relationship that lasted for 2 years and 4 months exactly. (Yes, we broke up on our “monthsary”) And I just want to share this.

Is the relationship a lost for us? Do I have regrets? Do I still love him? Does it hurt?  Sigh.

Of course, it’s a lost for me. All the things that we’ve been through all those years. All those fights, the negativeness we had for each other, all those discussions we had. Those hugs, those tender kisses, those little things that he did that always made me smile. Definitely a big lost for me, but I have no regrets loving him, or should I say “loved” him. I gave my best and almost my all but I guess it’s just not meant for us to be together anymore.

3rd question, I don’t really know the answer. I decided a long time ago that I don’t have any feelings for him anymore, that I don’t love him, that it’s my commitment to him that’s making me stay with him. But now, it’s somehow different. It still hurts. It’s like a punch in the gut. And it really sucks to be me right now. After all, it’s what I wanted for quite some time now, freedom. And F**K I got it on our 28th “monthsary”! You know the feeling of being strong all this time, well I guess I am not that strong.

What went wrong? I don’t have a clue, but here’s his last text for me :

"This is my last text for you. I don’t want to be in this relationship anymore. You better look for another man that will maybe make you happier. Please, don’t treat him the way you treated me. Don’t worry, I’m not mad. This relationship just seems unclear now. Thanks for all the memories. And I will be just here whenever you need me. Goodbye."

That’s his side. But I know I gave it all for him. I guess my best wasn’t good enough for him. I respect him and I think it’s better for us to part ways. I’ll start rebuilding myself again.

To you, I loved you and I’ll always cherish those days we had. Guess forever’s just a word. Goodbye.

  • Track: Easy
  • Artist: Rascal Flatts ft. Natasha Bedingfield
  • Plays: 19
Reblogged from musicmanlovesmyl  1 note

"Somebody who will love you as you were, as you are and as you will be..
No matter what and no matter how..
You two will forever be…”

~some lyrics from the new song I’m creating. :)

There are times in my life that I felt so down and lonely about the things that’s happening around me. Times when I’m trying to search for the right things in my life, and also times that I’m hoping it’s not too late for me.

"I can’t believe it’s over 

I watched the whole thing fall

And I never saw the writing that was on the wall 

If I only knew

Days were slipping past 

That the good things never last 

That you were crying…”

Relationships and friendships, I have gone through heartbreaks on that two. Those times were maybe the darkest days in my life. It’s like living on your nightmares and yes it’s very hard. There were moments when the good days will just flash on your mind and suddenly you’re happy but then you’ll just bump to something and there you were alone as days pass. It’s sad but I just don’t like people to see me like that because I don’t want to be anyone’s burden. So I just hide on my mask and smile.

"Summer turned to winter 

And the snow it turned to rain 

And the rain turned into tears upon your face 

I hardly recognized the girl you are today 

And god I hope it’s not too late 

It’s not too late…”

I always love the rain. It reminds me of how life can turn so fast, from sunny to cloudy and rainy. Ironic as it reminds me of my dark days, but I just love rain. It’s giving me the hope to come back from the fall that I’ve been through. It pushes me to think on the brighter side of things, to have coffee, to meditate, to cry and to come back as a stronger person. Life just makes us stronger after each storm.

"Life can show no mercy 

It can tear your soul apart 

It can make you feel like you’ve gone crazy 

But you’re not 

Things have seem to changed 

There’s one thing that’s still the same 

In my heart you have remained 

And we can fly fly fly away…”

Yes, life’s tough, and it can sometimes show no mercy. There will be moments when you’ll just break into pieces because you just can’t take anymore sadness or hardships. And there were moments when you just don’t understand anything that’s happening to you, and it feels like you’re going crazy. But don’t be. Always remember that each sadness has its own happiness. There would still be people on your back cheering you up and making you feel that you are loved and you are special. Just leave the bad or sad luggage and just fill your heart and life with happiness. There’s no use on holding grudges and bad memories on your life.

“‘Cause you are not alone 

I’m always there with you 

And we’ll get lost together 

Till the light comes pouring through 

'Cause when you feel like you're done 

And the darkness has won 

Babe, you’re not lost 

When your worlds crashing down 

And you can’t bear the cross

I said, babe, you’re not lost…”

Learn from life’s lessons. It’s always there for us to teach things that we can’t learn from school or from anyone. Learn from the bad memories, from the sad memories and learn to face them stronger next time. Just be careful with your heart. Release the pain every time you are feeling hurt because pain ,when not release, can poison your heart and make it stone-hard. Always remember that there are shoulders you can lean on, like your families and friends. Life’s unfair but it’s still up to us to make it fair.

"LIFE AND EXPERIENCE ARE THE BEST TEACHERS."

  • Track: Lost
  • Artist: Michael Bublé
  • Album: Call Me Irresponsible (Special Edition)
  • Plays: 19
Reblogged from picsandquotes  1,077 notes

20 Positions It Sucks To Be Put In

picsandquotes:

  1. Having someone request your assistance opening a tightly screwed lid and feeling tremendous amounts of pressure to deliver or face heaps of humiliation.
  2. Running into a person you’re attracted to but having to pretend like you don’t remember specific details about them, because for some odd reason society associates outstanding memory with creepers.
  3. Wanting to drink orange juice but being within an hour of having brushed your teeth and unwilling to risk tasting the atrocious toothpaste + O.J. combo.

Read More

Realizations are huge moments in one’s life. It can either be for good or for worse. But it  don’t come too easy on us. Sometimes it takes so much time which in return makes someone do a thing that he/she would regret in the end.

"Take time to realize..

That your warmth is crashing down on in..

Take time to realize..

That I am on your side..”


In love, we don’t always realize or recognize the one that’s really for us. Some people really ignored the feeling, some are ignoring the feeling because they don’t want to jeopardize the friendship and/or relationship while some people will just realize the feeling after he/she lost the feeling for the other man. While some, and usually the most difficult yet sweetest, is when they find and realize they’ve fallen to each other after all the bad things that happened in their lives, and in the most unexpected yet perfect time in their lives. And they’d know by then that they are really for each other.

"Take time to realize..

This hour could pass you by..

But I can’t spell it out for you..

No it’s never gonna be that simple..

No I can’t spell it out for you..”

In some instances, there comes a moment where one is so into another person but the sad part is that the feeling isn’t or isn’t yet mutual. It’s like you’re waiting for the crows to get white or like waiting for a storm in a desert. And you keep telling yourself that time is running out, we’re not an infinite thing in this world, and we only have one life. Thinking and wondering that hours and hours off your life is just passing by. But you can’t tell him/her what you feel. In some cases, you really don’t want to because you’re afraid of what he/she will react or say or do; and because you don’t want to ruin what you two have right now.

"It’s not the same..

No, it’s never the same..

If you don’t feel it too..

If you meet me halfway..

If you would meet me halfway..

It could be the same for you..”


They always say that love has two faces. It always has the good and bad memories. And there are people that fall in to the sad stories. Sometimes, what you feel isn’t the way your love is feeling. Sometimes, he/she’s really not for you. Sometimes, it’s just you who realizes the spark but then again you will realize that he will never be for you. Some say it’s destiny’s call but I believe that it’s our choice, the choice of us all people. But you would still be hoping or even praying for you to meet halfway. And if that will be granted, that’ll be the greatest day of your life.

But the good thing in love is that it should not be selfish. In love, you’re not only considering your feeling or your happiness but the happiness of both people in the relationship. That’s a part of true love. Win or lose, we should take it even though we know that it will hurt us. But just remember that pain is not there to stay. Just be strong and pray. And there will come a moment that you will realize and understand why all those things happened to you. Those things happened for a reason. And hopefully, you would realize that you are in love, to the person that you deserve and in return deserves you, for the rest of your life.

"If you just realize what I just realized..

That we’d be perfect for each other..

and we’ll never find another..

Just realize, what I just realized..

We’d never have to wonder..

If we missed out on each other now..”

REMEMBER: “True love’s not easy. But trust me, it’s worth it.” :)

The song is a cover from my most favorite band, BOYCE AVENUE! :) Hope you’ll enjoy it all

~edz13smyl

  • Artist: Boyce Avenue
  • Album: Acoustic Sessions Vol III
  • Plays: 19

Booth: Here we are. All of us. Basically alone, seperate creatures just circling each other. All searching for this slightest hint of a real connection. Some looking at the wrong places. Some may just give up hope because in their mind they’re thinking “Oh, there’s nobody out there for me!” But all of us, we keep trying over and over again. Why? Because every once in a while, every once in a while, two people meet, and there’s that spark. And yes Bones, he’s handsome and she’s beautiful. And maybe that’s all they see at first. But making love, making love, that’s when two people become one.

Bones: It is scientifically impossible for two objects to occupy the same space.

Booth: Yeah, but what’s important is we try. And when we do it right, we get close.

Bones: To what? Breaking the laws of physics?!

Booth: Yeah Bones. A miracle.

By "Bones"

"I’ve been living with the shadow over head..

I’ve been sleeping with a cloud above my bed..

I’ve been lonely for so long..

Trapped in the past I just can’t seem to move on..”

Sometimes there comes a time in our lives when we tend to feel lonely and very reserved. Well, some may say that it’s just a way of coping with things or getting ways back to normal again like moving on. But some, they just can’t seem to move on from their painful past. Some are just hiding and are too afraid that they will do the same mistakes again, and in effect, they will just close their doors to others. That way, they feel like getting back and being the same person again. But in reality, they just become more vulnerable because of those things that they hid inside of them.

I’ve been hiding all my hopes and dreams away..

Just in case I ever need ‘em again someday..

I’ve been setting aside time..

To clear a little space in the corners of my mind..”

Often times, people change whenever they encounter problems especially problems regarding their love life. Many of them may say that they just can’t live their lives anymore, and some will say that they should really take their minds away from the reason of their pains. While some just need enough time to clear things and set them into orders on their minds. But during the process, sometimes, they tend to become a different person;a totally different person from who they was. Some will divert their mind sets on a different direction as they want it naturally just to get away from the things that caused their pain. And sometimes, they’ll just stop dreaming and stop hoping for things to get better again because in their mind, it will never be the same again after a painful goodbye. But deep inside their hearts, no matter how painful you’ve been through, there will still be that hope; hope for happiness and true love.

"I’ve been watching but the stars refuse to shine..

I’ve been searching but I just can’t see the signs..

I know that it’s out there..

There’s gotta be something for my soul somewhere..”

There will come a time when someone just wish for the stars and don’t care if there’s someone really listening to them up there. Others do believe in “signs” and are looking and hoping for the right signs to come. Some may say it’s irrational but I guess, love isn’t about rational thinking after all. Luckily, there are these people that don’t give up easily. They will just try and try, over and over again for the hope of finding their “one”.

"I’ve been looking for someone to shed some light..

Not somebody just to get me through the night..

I could use some directions..

And I’m open to your suggestions..”

Whenever you feel hopeless and you’re needing some light to shed your life, something or someone will just be there for you. No matter how broke or jaded you were, there will be someone in your life that will try to share their light to you and help you to the right direction. During these times, the heart slowly becomes considering things again; allowing some feelings to grow and knock on the door of heart.

"There are moments when I don’t know if it’s real..

Or if anybody feels the way I feel..

I need inspiration..

Not just another negotiation..”

But then again, whenever you try to open your heart again for someone, there is this fear and pain that will just struck your mind out of nowhere. That’s the bad side of having your heart broken. It really leaves a scar in your heart. You now begin to think of many “what if’s” like “What if it’s not real?”, “What if he’s just playing me?”, “What if he doesn’t feel the same way that I feel?” But that’s all in your mind, a question of the mind and not of the heart. Yes, I know that it’s not all about the heart when it comes to love. We should really consider thinking of our decisions even in a relationship. Again, for me, Love is not a rational thing. I still believe that you should follow what your heart say when it comes to love especially when you know that it is really LOVE that you are feeling and it’s mutual.

"All I wanna do is find a way back into love..

I can’t make it through without a way back into love..

And if I open my heart to you..

I’m hoping you’ll show me what to do..

And if you help me to start again..

You know that I’ll be there for you in the end..”

Love is all we need. That is true. And I believe that ever since I was born. It’s our very foundation of living and feeling. Though there are times that we get ourselves hurt in a relationship, we shouldn’t close our hearts for someone else. There will be the proper time for that right true love for you. And when you’re ready to open your heart again, open it without hesitations and pains.

"Love like you’ve never hurt before."


-edz funelas-

-eDz13smYl :)-

  • Track: Way Back Into Love
  • Artist: Hugh Grant & Drew Barrymore
  • Plays: 99